The knees are crumbling!

14st 7lb. I have just got back from an appointment with the orthopaedic consultant about my knee. Right back at the beginning of my diet journey I said that one of the reasons for dieting is my health, which is not great. At the beginning of August, a friend and I took our girls camping in on the East coast and ended up on a whirly ride in Bridlington. It was fast and furious and if you consider getting crushed repeatedly by your best buddie as she is uncontrollably flung against you to be fun, then this is the ride for you! You hang on for dear life and brace your legs firmly against the bar under your feet. When I left the ride, my legs were like jelly and every muscle ached. Two days later, I woke up to find that my knee would bear no weight whatsoever and I ended up going straight to hospital for an xray. Suffice to say that I was referred to a specialist. During the past couple of months, it has got much better and now, other than aching knees after a long walk, I have no ill effects. However, according to my xrays I am showing early onset arthritis. This is not a great surprise as I have a clicky hip as well. When I asked the consultant what could I do to minimise the problem, surprise, surprise...lose weight!

It is my responsibility to look after my future health and I do think whichever politician it was that said the national health service should refuse to treat people who are seriously overweight for related illnesses until they get to a healthier state, had a point. What would be the point of spending the money on a knee replacement if I am going to continue to exert a great deal of pressure on it? On the drive back, I calculated that, inspite of losing one and a half stone this year, I am still carrying around the equivalent of three quarters of a sack of potatoes in excess weight, all the time. I would struggle to carry such a sack to the end of the lane but I am expecting my knees and hips to support that weight continuously. It is a bit of an eye opener.

I have also realised with shame that I have been in the 14stones since the 5th of September and weighed the same as I weigh now almost a month ago. This has got to stop. I need to really concentrate and get moving. I am really excited about the fact that my major sales at work finish next week (they go out with a bang - horrendous hours and I'm dreading them) but I am going to dedicate November to Elizabeth. I need TLC both physically and mentally. I am going to focus on the family, house and me. Good food, good exercise and some time to breathe. It won't happen, but I am going to try. Listening to Women's Hour on the way to the hospital, it was dedicated to Virginia Woolf and was talking in particular about her book "A Room of One's Own" and how she felt you need space both physically and mentally to be able to flourish. It has been my dream for years to have a room that is only mine - to read, relax, write, sew. In the chaotic world that is this household, we all suffer somewhat from being under each others' feet. There is no where to go if you want peace.

Dream on, Lizzie.......

E xx